sorry, this post is'nt the next part of my last post... hufff... yeah... here I am, sitting on my chair, hugging my piyo-pretending it's Pika, writing this... I feel soooooo baaaaaad lately, oh please forgive me God... I'm not a good person right now... I realize I'm wrong, but I can't control myself... when things going in the wrong direction, I just can't stop myself... what should I do? I want something, but I have to do bad things to get what I want... I know I deserve it! I've been waiting too long... but I've been too hurry, I'm affraid of losing again... I'm too affraid... until suddenly I realized, I've been pushing myself into this chaos... I'm ruining myself... what should I do? somebody...what should I do? would you fix it for me?? please...